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Thursday, March 27, 2008

On being a second time and better mom

Do I want to be a mummy again? Yes, of course!

Who wouldn't? That's what I thought. But surprisingly, I have met quite a number of ladies throughout my career who didn't. Some were dead set about not having kids at all to start off with.

Some were in a midst of a marriage bed which was filled with thorns and wilted roses. So having a kid would further complicate matters. Seem responsible? Others were traumatised during confinement when things went awry with MIL while some ladies didn't know how to cope with 'problematic' infants. By problematic I mean infants who were sickly or hyperactive, had problems feeding and whose personalities were a little more 'colourful' than their counterparts.

Who can blame these ladies who had to work and keep order in the house... at the same time fight raging postnatal hormones!

Well, everyone is entitled to their opinion.

I wouldn't say bringing up Josh was easy. Heck, it was tough during the first trimester of pregnancy when I had to be hospitalised twice for severe morning sickness and removal of the ovarian cyst. He was the kind of baby who didn't welcome milk, slept during the day and awoke during the night. Poor fella also had to endure being hospitalised a few times.

Those times were something you don't forget but also worth going through for. After 3 years, living with a toddler has more ups than downs.

I am also looking at this as a second chance in experimenting early parenthood. My friend Nicole decided not to regret the things she did or didn't do with Oliver. I try not to dwell in the past... but instead take it as lessons to better myself with the next baby. My new pregnancy / baby resolutions:-

1. Take folic acids and consume a healthier diet before pregnancy
2. Try for natural birth (maybe even contemplate water birthing) unless complications arise
3. Journal the pregnancy and take more shots
4. Buy nicer maternity clothes :)
5. Try harder in breastfeeding (save $$ too)
6. Be less kan-cheong, instead be wiser / calmer (effects the baby too)
7. Find a reliable day and night babysitter (healthier for relationships)
8. No sarong for baby
9.Try ferberizing (letting baby cry it out) whenever necessary
10.Try baby signing and massage

So, in a nutshell... children do make you or at least strive to be better person. I guess Jeff was right in saying what is life without children?

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